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losing streak

25/02/02 @ 3:22 p.m.

On Saturday night, after a pointless episode of Pop Idol stuffed with 20-tog padding, ITV stayed true to its standards of quality by repeating a show about streakers. I feel so cheap if I accidentally watch one of their shows - a few weeks back they actually had the nerve to broadcast one called “Britain’s Brainiest Estate Agent” - but I just couldn’t take my eyes off this piece of shit.
There was one guy who’d streaked at about thirty different sporting events and had been banned from every stadium in the country. He described it as comedy, almost as performance art. This guy, who spends his free time showing his ass to crowds of people, explained that he takes his clothes to a tailor who fixes them with Velcro so he can just rip them off. He dismissed other streakers’ lack of originality – not for him the simple arm waving, for this guy puts so much thought into it that when he streaked at the Grand National, he pretended to be riding a horse. Genius.
He explained that one time he’d forgotten to take his Velcro trousers with him, so he put his coat over his lap and spent half an hour gradually edging his trousers down his legs. The woman next to him thought he was having a quick wank, but, he explained, he was only taking his trousers off! What an innocent mistake! He wasn’t a pervert, he was just getting naked!
He said he streaks so often now that it’s more than just a hobby – it’s almost like a job. One that he doesn’t get paid for. That’s a hobby you knob-showing moron! Why is this on TV? And why is this guy allowed to waste a life like this? And why did I watch it? And why am I writing about it? Dammit, I need to spend some time thinking about worthwhile things for once!

b o o k m a r k s-----r u d i e s-----u p d a t e s-----m y--i l l n e s s -----m o v i e--r e v i e w s

Content and layout © Yawner, 2001. Hosted by Diaryland. Best viewed with IE5, probably pants with Netscape.


o l d-----n e w-----l a s t-----n e x t-----m e-----y o u-----m a i l-----n o t e s-----r i n g s-----







losing streak
25/02/02 @ 3:22 p.m.
On Saturday night, after a pointless episode of Pop Idol stuffed with 20-tog padding, ITV stayed true to its standards of quality by repeating a show about streakers. I feel so cheap if I accidentally watch one of their shows - a few weeks back they actually had the nerve to broadcast one called “Britain’s Brainiest Estate Agent” - but I just couldn’t take my eyes off this piece of shit. There was one guy who’d streaked at about thirty different sporting events and had been banned from every stadium in the country. He described it as comedy, almost as performance art. This guy, who spends his free time showing his ass to crowds of people, explained that he takes his clothes to a tailor who fixes them with Velcro so he can just rip them off. He dismissed other streakers’ lack of originality – not for him the simple arm waving, for this guy puts so much thought into it that when he streaked at the Grand National, he pretended to be riding a horse. Genius. He explained that one time he’d forgotten to take his Velcro trousers with him, so he put his coat over his lap and spent half an hour gradually edging his trousers down his legs. The woman next to him thought he was having a quick wank, but, he explained, he was only taking his trousers off! What an innocent mistake! He wasn’t a pervert, he was just getting naked! He said he streaks so often now that it’s more than just a hobby – it’s almost like a job. One that he doesn’t get paid for. That’s a hobby you knob-showing moron! Why is this on TV? And why is this guy allowed to waste a life like this? And why did I watch it? And why am I writing about it? Dammit, I need to spend some time thinking about worthwhile things for once!
	b o o k m a r k s-----r u d i e s-----u p d a t e s-----m y--i l l n e s s -----m o v i e--r e v i e w s







	Content and layout © Yawner, 2001. Hosted by Diaryland. Best viewed with IE5, probably pants with Netscape.